England World Cup Rap

From early days our playing ways were purely practical

No intent to reinvent or cement something maturely tactical

Allardyce and others like him are surely too didactical

And people are surprised when England’s tournament time is anticlimactical

We had the nightmare of Nice against an immutable Iceland

So might there be a cease to the FA’s usual silence?

Guus Hiddink on a 2-year plan was clearly warranted

If they did it that super man would have been sincerely restorative

But oh no, the blazers running the show, appraisers of what they know

They amaze us when they fix their gazes like lasers on the safe-choice pro How’s it looking?

What, they’re cooking the same old recipe??

Trevor Brooking shouldn’t be touching England’s football destiny!

St George’s Park gives us a sort of spark and a modernity

But until we fulfil, thrill and win to nil v Brazil and Germany

There’s still many corners for turning and reforming of learning FA earnings are concerning so I’ve a yearning to bring Barry Hearn in

And while we’re at it, let’s get Sir Clive Woodward and Simon Jordan

There’d be no boredom with him as the foreman, blazers would be discordant

So Goodnight Vienna, put it right whenever – then we’ll know he tried

Raw plans become deep-fried, stored into the C: Drive and we thrive – that’s good enough for me, Clive!

We should incorporate ideas for debate, get former England players on board and their former mates

And they could formulate concepts, and inaugurate a new forum – they’d all be equal, no subordinates!

I’m sure we can find a role for Harry Redknapp – he’d be top, top class

And give Gazza something to do – keep him off the bottle and the shot glass

I believe in Southgate to lead us through the challenges we now face

I tell my housemates we won’t be outrun or outpaced

We got youthful flair – that much is truthfully there

It’s not just useful, it’s crucial in an extra-time affair

It is fruitful and shouldn’t be unusual when a World Cup’s in the air

So give it your approval if you’re not a neutral, and like me, you care

And through the door without pain, we can score against Spain

Breed more of those with a football brain, and the three lions will roar again!