7 Signs You're Ready to Befriend Your Ex

Claire Small's picture
Authored by Claire Small
Posted Sunday, December 29, 2019 - 10:18am

Modern dating is a complicated feat that involves a lot of trials and errors before landing on the most compatible relationship. The quest for finding your soulmate isn’t easy. It witnessed a lot of ups and downs and can take a toll on your mental health. One such difficult step is moving on. After having spent a lot of time with your potential partner, you realize that it just isn’t working for you. However, it gets difficult to break up and even harder to move on because you still feel attached. 

If you’ve been through an ordeal within your relationship, you simply cannot imagine going back or talking to your ex ever again. You need some time to get over her and set your mind. Once you’ve gained clarity, you might either want to win her back or get into a platonic relationship with being just friends. If you want the former, this Get Her Back Guide blog post might help you, but if you want to befriend your ex, you need some signs. Either way, you can get back in touch. So what are those signs if you may ask? 

Here are seven of those to manifest some certainty that you’re absolutely ready to befriend your ex.

You’ve stopped stalking her

You’re no longer keen on her social life and have buried the curiosity of her recent whereabouts. Sure, you wouldn’t mind knowing what’s going on in her life, but you’re surely not drop dead curious, worried or obsessive about it. When you find yourself not checking her social media every day, and discarded Facebook and Instagram stalking completely, it’s a major sign that you’re ready to befriend her.

You’re attracted to someone else

This is another major sign that you have moved on. Being attracted to or crushing on someone else clears the path for a new relationship and declares that you no longer have any emotional ties with your ex except for a platonic relationship. Also, you wouldn’t have any problem with her dating someone else.

You had great communication

If you’ve had a connection and amazing communication with your ex, you might feel the need to be friends and ask for advice. If during or after the relationship, her opinions mattered and still do, you know that you’ll need her for further advice. Moreover, if you have this comfort zone of talking about new crushes, you’ve got yourself a new best friend. In fact, you can ask each other for advice on working on your weaker points to make your new relationship work.

There is no resentment or grudges

Laughing about your fights and arguments when you two were together is something all exes wish for. It means that you’ve truly forgiven each other and there are no grudges left. Both of you consider it to be a learning phase of your life that taught you better for the future. It’s all about constructive criticism. If you’re still hung up on some rude comments from your ex while you were together, it’s a clear sign that you aren’t ready to be friends yet.

You had a stable breakup

If it didn’t involve abusive fights, harsh sentences or screaming and shouting, your breakup was a mutual understanding. If you parted ways due to emotional issues or if you just didn’t feel it was right, you agreed to separate mutually. This establishes respect for each other and you can go back to becoming friends. Some people aren’t destined to be together and are better off as friends. 

You both have your own boundaries

Now that it’s been a while since you’ve broken up and are no longer living together, you respect each other’s personal lives and don’t mingle unless asked to. When you meet, you don’t get any romantic impulses as well. This shows that you’ve established your own boundaries. You can freely meet each for lunch or for movies like normal friends do.

You’re already dating someone

If your new relationship is crystal clear with your partner knowing everything about your previous relationship and your ex, you can easily become friends with her. Your partner doesn’t have any problem with it and doesn’t see it as a threat. You’re happy in your relationship and your ex is happy for you. 

Not everyone agrees to the fact that exes can still be friends. Some just share that rapport of being better friends than partners. You never know, your new best friend can be a much better person for you than she was as a girlfriend. If you’re experiencing these signs, you can definitely be friends with your ex.