Exeter joins in national recognition of baby loss

On Saturday 14th April 2018 at 1pm, Exeter Cathedral will hold the first in a set of national remembrance services for people who have experienced baby loss, whether during pregnancy, at birth or in infancy.

Nearly 20 services will be held around the UK, allowing bereaved parents, families and friends to join together in acknowledging and remembering babies that have gone too soon.

The services are organised by The Mariposa Trust, which held its first service at Exeter Cathedral in 2012, and celebrated its 100th service at the end of 2017 in Westminster, London.

The charity now provides support that reaches over 50,000 people each week through it’s 6 divisions offering support through baby loss, pregnancy after baby loss, fertility, adoption and more.

The charity was founded by Zoe and Andy Clark-Coates from Devon, who sadly suffered the loss of 5 babies. They saw that there was an extreme lack of support available to parents like them, and so decided to start the ‘Saying Goodbye’ services. Now 5 years on, the charity holds Cathedral services in England, Wales, Scotland, Northern Ireland, France and the US, and is looking to expand these further in 2018 and beyond.

Sadly baby loss affects around 1 in 4 pregnancies each year in the UK, with nearly 700 babies lost each day. When parents go through the devastating loss of a baby, whether during pregnancy, at birth or in infancy, they often feel isolated and unable to process the overwhelming grief and trauma that miscarriage, stillbirth, neonatal and early years loss brings. The services allow people to stand with others who have experienced the similar trauma of baby loss, and collectively acknowledge and remember each life lost.

The services are open to people of faith or no faith, whether people have lost recently or decades ago, and welcome not only parents, but also the extended family and friends. The services are uplifting and moving events filled with music, poems, acts of remembrance and more, and have been attended by countless thousands of people, who have found healing and solace by attending.

One of the many attendees said this about her experience of attending a service: “The Saying Goodbye service gave me the time and space to formally recognise all of my babies and the experience of being with people who just knew how it felt was a real strength. The loss of a baby by miscarriage is never formally recognised by ceremony - no funeral service is held, no date is noted, no names are recorded. As I stood with other parents and proudly rang the bell for my 14 babies, I felt unbearable sadness but also a great privilege in being able to properly celebrate their existence. For the first time ever I felt my tears of grief, loss and love were allowed, shared and understood.”

Zoe Clark-Coates commented “We invite anyone who has gone through or been affected by baby loss, to join us for this special event. Come and join with others who have been through a similar expereince, in remembering all those who have gone too soon, because every baby matters!”

More information on the charity can be found at www.mariposatrust.org and via www.sayinggoodbye.org

The charity can be followed on Facebook at www.facebook.com/sayinggoodbyeuk and on Twitter @SayingGoodbyeUK. The charity can be contacted by email at office@sayinggoodbye.org